By Andrew Ayala
Dating apps should not be misconstrued as real dating since people who use them are simply swiping and interpreting people by their profile photos and 50 word bio.
There is nothing wrong with people turning to technology to try and nd love or lust, but dating appsdo not even come close to going out to a bar or asking someone on a date in real-life.
Sure people are interacting in one way or another, but they are missing that human interaction. The body language, which is what we can’t get from a screen.
“Most of our communication is non-verbal. This is something scientifically researched. You can tell how a person feels before they even say a word,” said Irwing Jimenez, an Assistant Professor of Sociology. “Bodylanguage is de nitely importantin the cadence of how you speak to someone in that environment is completely different.”
I personally have
tried dating apps anddidn’t nd success.
Instead I found myself in a funk, miserably swiping left and right at people I really had no interest in at all.
When I would match with someone the conversations were plain and seemed like a waste of time and energy.
I found more success going out to parties or events with friends and having face-to-face interactions.
I have friends who nd what theyare looking for and continue the cycle with multiple partners, which is something I didn’t want to be a part of. There is no shame in doing so, but some people are looking for a genuine connection.
When people go to bars or on a date, they are at least able to see a bit of what the person is like and get a feel for them.
A person’s rst impression is the one that usually in uences how theyare treated and viewed.
This is vital when it comes down to starting a potential relationship or friendship.
Jimenez said the fact that people can do what they would have to do at a bar or in a social location from the leisure of their house also adds to the problem. It is so accessible that people can get lost in the swipes and ultimately forget the reason they downloaded the app, which wasprobably to nd love.
Looking at someone in a perfectly angled photo in perfect lighting can also be an issue that dating apps bring. Someone can look one wayin their pro le photo and different inperson, which causes issues.
This is known ascat shing and MTVeven has a show about it, which shows how bigger issues can arise such as depression and suicidal thoughts.
These apps are presented to us and promoted, but it is rare when a marriage or true love comes from it. About 30% of Tinder users are married and one in three divorces start as online affairs, according to studies and statistics from McKinley Irvin Family Law. This goes to show just how many people are looking for a quick hook-up or just plain lust.
It also proves the shift in culture we have had as Americans and proves that we are turning to technology for everything at this point. It would be quite interesting to have to tell your kids you met your spouse on a dating app. The idea of love at rst sight and otherchivalrous ways are being killed by mobile devices.
There is nothing wrong with using these apps for whatever need people may have, but people should get out of their comfort zones and not rely on a device to match them with Mr. or Ms. right.
“The advent of dating apps and things of that sort have just become sort of a commercialized way of love and affection,” said Jimenez.
“I don’t think we have the same sort of reverence or respect for relationships now. They seem sort of disposable to us because we swipe left and swipe right.”