By Cynthia Solis
Love and heartbreak are a part of life. Often, readers seek books that will validate how they feel. “Sometimes I Fall Asleep Thinking About You” by Catarine Hancock is no exception to this.
“Sometimes I Fall Asleep Thinking About You” is a collection of poetry about how it feels to not get closure.
It shares the feeling of longing people after a breakup even after knowing they should not. It shows the refreshing feeling of being able to say, “I have finally let you go” after time passes.
This is the fourth poetry book Hancock has written, the first being “The Boys I’ve Loved and the End of the World,” “How the Words Come” and “Shades of Lovers.”
Her writing predominately follows similar themes of love and its aspects, both good and bad. Her works also include political topics she feels passionately about, such as feminism and gun control.
“Sometimes I Fall Asleep Thinking About You” is a lot like “Shades of Lovers”— it starts with the reader finally realizing that the breakup they went through is typical and that all the feelings they feel are valid. Readers end up wishing the book would end toward the middle.
Her poems tend to be somewhat repetitive. All beginning with “I loved you, but you didn’t love me the same way,” and end with, “It hurts now, but I am strong and will get through this, and one day I will see you and your existence won’t bother me anymore.”
While there is absolutely nothing wrong with having these elements in a poetry book about love and loss, it is not something that needs to be said over and over again with little variety.
As the reader goes through each poem, the reader keeps expecting something more, but it never comes.
This is rather unfortunate because it had such great potential to be a phenomenal poetry book.
The book is for readers who are suffering from a breakup and need to know someone else has felt what they are feeling. These can be readers who haven’t made any progress in the healing process either.
After reading the first 80 pages, the book forces the reader to contemplate the fact that they can’t seem to get over one breakup.
It truly makes them analyze every conversation, all the good memories, and indeed all the bad times.
One particularly noteworthy poem was “a quarantine poem.” In it, Hancock considers an alternate universe in which COVID-19 didn’t happen and the world was like it was before March 2020. In this alternate universe her significant other did not hurt her the way she was hurt. Here she explores the utter definition of an amicable breakup.
This poem is worth remembering out of all of the poems in its 205 pages because many people often wonder, “If this didn’t happen, things would be so different.” Many people have done it at one point or another during the pandemic. Some wonder whether it was because someone they know or themselves lost a job or any other reason.
It was spread all over social media that the pandemic wouldn’t last forever and everyone can get through quarantine.
Similarly, with heartbreak, the pain and confusion do not last forever. Eventually the breakup won’t bother a person anymore.
At the end of the day (and end of the book), it is essential for readers to remember everyone deserves someone who will love them all-consumingly, acknowledging all the “bad” about them but simply loving them more for their flaws.
No one desrves to be in a toxic relationship. People deserve someone who knows they are worth it all. The book is very clear on both of these points and displays it in a kind and gentle manner.